Here we are, day three. On time! Quiet house.
And then... suddenly it hits me. I. Have. A child. In. High School. (Even though at this very moment he is in his bed sleeping because he is sicker than sick) I am sad! The little boy I left at kindergarten after he told me it's okay mom, you can go, I will be fine, and I knew what he was really telling me was, mom you will be fine. The boy we dumped into a brand new school at the end of first grade, who came home that first day and told us it was great, everybody was so nice to me! The same boy I watched walk all the way down the street (boy it was nice living right there) into the Jr. High parking lot until I couldn't see him anymore. Just last year another new school, I knew when he came home he would tell me yeah, it was fine, I made some new friends, and he did. That boy, he is the one, the one that is not a little boy anymore. He is almost as tall as his dad, and wears great big shoes, and startles me when he walks up behind me just because he is bigger than I expect. He is setting off down the path that leads further and further away from me. With his own hopes and dreams and memories to make.
and I thought I wasn't going to be emotional this week. HA!
6 comments:
Maybe it IS a bad week for me anyways, but I was crying reading this. I hate the fact they are growing up, can't we give them something to STOP! Or maybe just GROUND them from growing any further.
I don't feel your pain, YET. Well, a little, because mine are slowly leaving my nest for school. Everyone always says "Enjoy these days because they go by so quickly!" and so I try. Still, it's hard when Kacy asks me tough questions like, "When can I wear make-up?" "High-heels?" "Drive a car?" "Go to church dances?" and on and on. Our job as parents is to help them become great adults- that's how we progress. And that is what I tell myself when Kacy freaks me out with her questions. I'd be ticked if my mom somehow found out how to make me a pre-teen forever... holy crap, that would bite. And a teen? My heart hurts just thinking about it...
Thanks Karrie you are right. Imagine being stuck there... ick. Huh, I feel better, a little anyway. I think I was looking back this morning, as I wrote this post and I don't feel like I enjoyed all those little moments as much as I should have!
OMG Cori- I got a misty teary reading that!!!! I don't want to get there. It's amazing how we want our kids when they're little to just grow up and when they do, there's no way to squish them down again. Wow.. I can't believe he's in HS! I hope he starts feeling better!
And then you are a grandma...wondering how all of her grandchildren are getting so big. And watching her own children going through the emotions of watching their children growup.
I think what makes it harder is the fact that we started really young too..so we don't feel like we should be going through all of this yet! I should have a kid out of high school, a senior, a 10th grader and my youngest in 8th grade! And then I look at our yougest sister who is just starting...would I want to be there again...I don't know...I have made the choice to enjoy them right now and not look back...and today is a good day..can't say what tomorrow will bring but today is a good day!
Post a Comment