Classroom Crazies

I think as parents if we knew all the things our children say when we are not around we would walk around in perpetual embarrassment. I help in Josh's class on Thursday mornings, here are some of the things I heard today;
1. (little girl in the class) "My dad went away for a few days to look for a new ummm (job? I asked) Yeah, but he'll be back Sunday, when is Sunday? Because he fights with my mom a lot!" (So maybe not a job, maybe a house, I'm still not clear)
2. (different little girl in the class) "I have step sisters and brothers and half sisters and brothers, but only 2 whole brothers, because we all got stolen!" (??? and then I missed the rest of that statement as she went out the door)
3. (little boy in the class) He actually didn't say a whole lot, just threw everything off his desk and when I picked it up, threw everything off the girl's desk next to him, and then emptied them both and tried to tip the desk over. It's amazing how fast kids move. The teacher got him over to the door and the middle school principal came and took him out. Poor kid was having a really bad day!
This I just think was funny... the teacher explaining why we say "She doesn't" as opposed to "She don't" said "She don't is hill billy talk and we just don't talk that way here." She can say this because she lives here and probably taught some of their parents.
The thing is I know Josh says embarrassing things too, like telling his teacher he was so late on Tuesday "because we had friends over and watched a movie really late so then we all slept in." Which is technically true but it wasn't nearly as much fun as it sounded!